Half way yet? October 28, 2006 at 9:30 pm

I am conflicted about the impressions people are having about my weight loss. The weirdest part for me is that so many people keep on telling me that I am looking good. In comparison I ~may~ look much better when put against the image of the near past, but I am not quite half way to my revised target goal! On one hand when I still wear my XXXL clothes I look ridiculously skinny. That illusion disappears quickly in the XL clothes. On Friday I made the half way point of the weight I would be extremely happy with myself if I achieved it. If I never make it under 210 I will be happy and much healthier than I have been in years. However with the realization that 180-200 is actually possible I have been starting to think that I should try for 200 and then see if 180 or even 190 is possible. I don’t know how I will feel about it, but with the diet and supervision that the program offers it may be possible. The quandary is if I should celebrate the halfway mark now or wait until -64. Given my past history that ~could~ be as early as this Friday. It doesn’t matter much, but it is nice to think about the milestones of accomplishment.

One cool thing about all of the XL clothes and smaller jeans I have purchased lately is that when I do get closer to whatever goal I finally am happy with the interim fat clothes will be a little too large. I am in size 36 jeans comfortably now. (At least one brand.) The size 38’s that I got a few weeks back require a belt. I can’t even imagine putting on the size 44’s and 46’s that I still have. Shorts don’t bother me and I am avoiding getting any new shorts. Shorts that were way too tight (some even have the buttons placed at the very end of the fabric to give a little more room!) around my hips are loose around my waist now. Is that insane or what?

For people that run every day my next accomplishment isn’t much to write home about, but it made me feel pretty dam good. On Friday I was able to jog at 4.4 mph during my time on the tread mill for about 2 minutes without killing my legs or myself. 2 minutes in a 30 minute session isn’t much, but it did get my heart rate in the 162 range and felt reasonably well. Oh and that was at a 9% grade too. I can see the day nearing when I could jog the entire treadmill session. The question is if that happens before or after the New Year. Two months isn’t that much time, but the last three have gotten me this far so it is possible.

I leave with the thinking that my goal is going to be 200 with the realization that 210 may be my limit. 180 is a consideration only after I achive the others. 30 Pounds (180-210) is quite a range. When I pick up 50 pounds of dumbbells I find it unbelievable that I carried that much extra for so long. Wow. 

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